Parramatta enforcer Nathan Brown has good reason for vowing not to tone down the aggression when he faces Brisbane in Sunday's NRL elimination final.
Brown will make a welcome return for the Eels after being rubbed out for two games for shoulder charging against Canterbury in round 23.
It was the first time in his NRL career the Eels firebrand has been suspended, despite coming under constant fire for supposed grubby tactics early in his career.
"I've said it to a few people, that it's my first time getting suspended, and they go, 'What? I can't believe it'," Brown told AAP.
Brown admits being frustrated with a reputation that often precedes him.
"It peeves me off a bit because it's something that I've got a reputation for, and I don't know why because I'd never been suspended before this," he said.
"I made my debut when I was 22, so it's been four or five years. But yeah, that's the first time I've ever been suspended at NRL level."
Brown was heavily admonished when he stepped on the groin of Gold Coast prop Agnatius Paasi back in 2017, only to ultimately avoid sanction.
And critics also bring up his two-game suspension for his role in an ugly all-in brawl while playing for the Wests Tigers in an under-20s match back in 2013.
"It gets annoying when people bring up that under-20s thing because it happened six years ago," Brown says.
"I don't like it when people bring that up. It happened, obviously, when I was younger. I moved on from it, like how I'm going to move on from this incident.
"It's the first time I've been suspended, so why change the way I play now?"
Brown conceded he felt the need to apologise to his Eels teammates for the shoulder charge that rubbed him out for the past fortnight.
The Italian international has emerged as the leader of the team's forward pack, having averaged 123 metres and 27 tackles in 58 minutes this season.
"I 100 per cent had to apologise, because it doesn't help when anyone goes to the sin bin. I put my hand up and apologised straight away," he said.
"And while we never make excuses, it definitely didn't help."
© AAP 2019